Return Of the Kids
by lightdragon1987
Summary: What happens when you shrink the Justice League? Our fic! This is a story about seven heroes that find themselves as children once more. Guess who's unhappy about it! Yes this lovely gem of crazy is brought to you by Kita chan and I.
1. Chapter 1

Return of the Kids

Author Note: This Fic is brought to you by me and Kita chan. We are CRAZY by the way so this is a Parody. Chances of people being in character slim to none.

BATMAN

Batman had the mook by the cuff of his collar and pressed him against the alleyway's graffiti covered wall. The guy was trembling in his knock-off Nikes.

"I won't ask again. Where's the drop!" Batman demanded. Like hell if there was going to be a new drug dealer moving into his city.

"I don't know," mook cried; really cried with tears and everything. Snot was dripping on to the bat gloves, _He is gonna pay for that._

"Wrong answer," and that's when things went wrong for Batman. He was still holding on to the mook but now was more hanging off the guy. His cowl was now too big for his head so he could no longer see out of it. "Balls."

He then kicked the mook in the balls because, well, he was at the right height for it. It was more of a launch off point as he let go and proceeded to try running. The main problem being his cap was now more like a wedding train. Tripping over himself, he rolled like he was trapped in a giant tire and slammed into the back wall. The mook was still holding himself, doubled over, but his friends were now coming down the alleyway, trying to figure out what all the noise was.

Batman was dazed, getting up when he heard one of them say, "You got nut shoot by that little punk?"

"Balls." He need to run. Or get up high, which caused him to go for the grappling hook on his belt. And with that, the bat boy found himself sailing faster than usual and the mooks were trying to grab at his over large clothes to pull him down. They ended up with one of his boots.

Safe on a roof top, Bruce pulled the over large cowl off his head, and sighed as he was now going to make his way home with only one boot. Tonight had not gone well. He had a feeling it was only going to get worst. He tucked the cape and cowl under his arm, and made the lonely trek home. It wasn't like anyone was going to believe who he was.

THE FLASH

He was at the bar, Trickster had broken out again. As Lady Luck would have it, the Flash was able to trick the Trickster into playing darts with him. It was one more game, and then dropping off the Trickster back to his cell. Over all Flash felt he was very lucky to have villains like Trickster he got to go out on his Fridays to bars and have a good talk every now and then.

"James that was a great shot, " Flash complimented, "After this round we should get you back to the hospital."

"Alright Flash if you're sure," Trickster handed Flash some darts.

"I am," Flash was getting ready to throw when suddenly he wasn't at the right angle for the board anymore. His costume was now bigger all over, and his hands were too thick to be able to throw the dart.

"You...you are not the Flash!" The trickster shouted, and began to throw darts at him.

"Now James!" Wally tried to calm him down and dodging them as the Trickster threw them. "Why don't we talk about this?" He said, being careful not to trip. Why did he sew his boots to the ends of his pants?

"The Flash was my friend what did you do with him?" Trickster demanded.

"James it's me, who else runs this fast?" Wally squeaked. Then his communicator went off.

"Flash are you alright?" It sort of sounded like Batman but he couldn't be sure with the cracking tone at the end.

"No! No I'm not okay. I'm short!"

"That makes two of us." The Dark Knight cracked out with a voice that cracked in the middle of the sentence.

SUPERMAN

Superman was where he should be at night, asleep in his own bed. Clark had the blankets wrapped tightly around him, snuggled up warm in his bed, when he got a call. It interrupted his dream about Lois. The one where they are trapped on a desert island and the only food they have was beef bourguignon. His communicator went off loudly and woke him up with a jolt. Half awake, he grabbed at it and answered, "Kent."

"Kent. Have, you noticed anything different about yourself?" It was Bruce. _Why is Bruce calling me at..._He glanced over at his alarm clock, _11:30 to asking me how I am?_

"Madds faus." Superman wasn't the sharpest when he woke up.

"What? Are you feeling alright Clark? Do you need us to come get you?"

"I am fine, you woke me-" That is when he realized something was wrong. Batman's voice wasn't right. Neither was his. He was also swimming in his night clothes. And clearly short. "GREAT SCOTT!"

"Yes, Flash, Clark is suffering from it too. Met us at the Watchtower."

WONDER WOMAN & HAWKGIRL

It was girl's night out. That is what Sharyera had told Diana it was. They were just going to go out and hit up some clubs when five muggers decided that they were easy targets. Shayera beamed another mook with her mace. _Why do__ they always pick on the girl with a mace? Do they think they have a chance? _Shayera glanced over at Diana and saw that there was something different about Wonder Woman.

It was more as if she was wonder girl.

Diana stood there and wanted to cry. She had been fighting a thug, last one out of five, when her clothing no longer fit her. In fact, they had fallen around her knees. She got an almost lucky shot in that knocked the man out before she flashed him. Over all this was one of the more humiliating moments in her life. She looked over and saw that Sharyera was much in the same state, her clothes to large, but she was at least covered.

Her armor couldn't protect her. The bracers were loose and her headband was too big. She managed to get one of the thugs jacket off so she wouldn't feel as exposed. It was large enough to cover everything.

"Diana? Has anything happened to you? Is Hawkgirl with you?" it was Bruce and that just seemed to be the breaking point.

"Yes," she cried.

"Um, we'll beam you two up to the Watchtower." Bruce was sure she sounded like she was going to cry. _Great. We are all kids and Diana is gonna start crying._

"NO!" It was a gut response. "I mean..."

"Flash, get out." Bruce seemed to read her mind. Sharyera seemed be trying not to laugh. "We will see you, when you are situated. Meet in the monitor womb." His voice made a loud cracking sound that caused Sharyera to spill into laughter.

"Thanks..."

GREEN LANTERN

_Disease. _That was all, John could think of as he was covered in green slime. _I hope I don't get a disease. _ He was out in space, on Lantern duty, and the Alien he was talking to had decided to cover him in slime. There hadn't been a reason, beside the fact that he was not telling the Alien what he wanted to hear. That is when the Alien decide that it was time to open the flood gates and cover him in slime. _Well, since it came from his mouth, it is more likely puke….this asshole puked on me._ Growing up in the inner city, there was one thing you never did. You never puked on John Stewart.

His ring glowed brightly and he made a lawnmower to chew the Alien up and spit him out again. John watched his lawnmower construct with a manic grin, though everything was starting to get fuzzy. _Stupid Alien goo._

"John," Batman with a cracking voice came over his com, "Are you shorter?"

"No, but I kicked some bad guys ass!" John fixed his eye sight problem, "Why?"

"You should come back to the tower," Batman voice cracked again.

"Okay, and the lawnmower totally works!" There was a pause, "What is wrong with your voice?"

"JUST GET BACK HERE OKAY!"

"Fine," John whined.

MARTIAN MANHUNTER

Jo'nn was eating Oreos. That's it. He was in the monitor womb when he too, changed into a small child. The Martian Manhunter looked at his new shorter limbs confused, then shrugged and began to eat more Oreos.

Bruce Wanye aka Batman came running into the womb, sporting pants that were very rolled up at the ankles and an over sized batman t-shirt, "Jo'nn are you…never-mind clearly your fine cause you have Oreos!"

"Would you like one Bruce?" Jo'nn asked holding out a cookie.

"No! Why are we kids! And how many of us and… and yes I want a cookie." Batman cursed himself as he grabbed about six and began to shove them into his mouth as if his life depended on it. "Now," He said with a mouth full of oreos, "How many of us are kids?"

"I believe just the original seven. No one else in the league has been panicky calling other members." The Martian looked at Bruce, "Nice shirt."

"Funny."

"HOLY HERA YOU ARE MICRO!" Diana said, coming into the room and throwing her arms around the batman's neck.

"Ar!" Bruce choked out as he was being choked by a girl who was almost a foot taller than him. The other originals filtered into the room. The Flash was trying to carry a towering amount of snack food with him. He had given up trying to run with it.


	2. Chapter 2

THE MAGNIFICENT SEVEN

The founders of the league had locked themselves in the meeting room. With candy which was always a win. Wally was pretending to be a walrus with pixy sticks which had John trying to take them from him.

"You are the last person that needs more sugar." John snapped.

"I don't know. You can be just as bad." Clark laughed.

"I am not."

"I got one word for you. Lawnmower," Clark pointed out.

"It totally worked!"

After being distracted by cookies Batman decided he needed to take action. This first step was to secure the room. He was going to make sure that no one could walk in on them by pushing a chair in front of the door and sitting in it. Despite the fact that the door worked like the ones in Star Trek, complete with a swooshing sound. It was Batman's money and he could make the doors sound like whatever he wanted. "Now then...How did this happen?" He asked.

Flash just started giggling.

"What!" Bruce demanded crossing his arms over his chest trying to look as intimidating as his child body would allow. Which, it turns out, was not that intimidating.

"You really think a chair blocking the door is going to work?" Flash giggled even more.

"Shut up Wally. Don't make me hurt you."

"Like you could...shorty." This was a mistake. A mistake that Wally soon learned to never make again. There is one thing you don't do, and that is call the Batman short. Bruce leaped from the chair tackling Wally to the ground. Clark tried to pull Bruce off of Wally but only got a bloody nose for his efforts. Everyone else watched stunned. Bruce was half way through pounding poor little Wally's face when he seemed to realize what he was doing. He quietly got off of Wally, and went back to his chair.

"Sorry...Boarding School was rough." He offered, sounding genuinely, as that would excuse the behavior.

Wally nodded but didn't look him in the eye. He quietly went back to his seat absentmindedly rubbing

his face.

"Are you all right?" Diana asked, moving to check him over only to have Wally flinch slightly.

"Give me a moment," Wally whispered, "... I'm fine. Just wasn't expecting that reaction."

"Again, Sorry."

"It is alright man. When we can drive again, you owe me a nice car..."

"Done."

Wally smiled brightly, making a mental note to never call Bruce short. It would be best for both of them. He frowned slight, "Though, if I ever have a freak out asking for my Uncle someone needs to find him. Like faster than I can run."

Clark was holding his bloody nose, stunned. "Guys...I...I don't have my powers anymore..."

They all turned to look at him.

"You are bleeding," John stated the obvious then handed him a napkin from the pile of food.

"How can you not have your powers?" Bruce felt baffled and guilty for taking out two team members in a fit of childish temper. "It's not like you got them through a chemical reaction."

"Well, what do hormones count as?" He asked.

"CHEMICALS!" Wally Shouted, "The best way to get a power."

"Wait, you got your powers by going through puberty?" Bruce asked, now ignoring Wally.

"Yea."

"Then how did you get to keep them the last time?"

Diana piped in, "Well, last time, we were adult in our child form...but this feels different...I think we really are children now."

"Do you still have your powers then?" Bruce felt skeptical, after all why would they have their adult memories if they were truly children.

"Of course. I get my powers from the Earth and the Gods, so as long as those don't disappear I'll always have them."

"If the earth disappeared that would be a real problem." Wally pointed out, "But we won't be here to talk about it."

"And you?" Bruce rolled his eyes, and looked at Wally.

"Did the experiment at eleven," Wally shrugged, "I wanted to be like Flash. You know I'm the second right?"

"Wait, you're the second Flash?" John asked, "Where's the first one?"

"Oh, buried in my basement." Everyone stared at him for a while, not sure if he was joking or not. Wally face palmed. "He's my Uncle!"

Bruce shook his head, "You were Kid Flash. Of course."

"Wasn't in my file?" Wally said with a bright grin, "He's in semi-retirement by the way. Safe and sound."

Bruce decided to rescue the conversation, turning to J'onn, who had just finished off the Oreos. "You don't seem too worried about this."

J'onn just shape shifted into his normal body.

"Well great at least one of us can go about their lives in a normal fashion," John grumbled, "What're we going to do?"

"DON'T MAKE ME GO BACK TO SCHOOL! IT WAS HARD ENOUGH THE FIRST TIME!" Wally shouted.

"Wally," Bruce started to say before he had an arm full of Flash.

"You know what it's like right? Being a head of everyone then having to sit there acting like a normal kid," Wally whined, "I can't go back there."

"It isn't prison Wally."

"YES! YES IT IS AND YOU KNOW IT!"

"Did you go to boarding school?" Bruce asked.

"No."

"Then you have no idea, so shut up," Bruce calmly patted Wally on the head, "And no we aren't going back to school. I wouldn't inflict you on the public school system again. Now let me go."

"Fine," Wally gave him a full hug before sprinting out of the line of fire, "But you are surprisingly nice to hug."

Bruce took a long deep breath. He was going to duct tape that kid to the floor when he got a chance. But for now, he had other things to deal with. "Now, how do we think this happened?"

"Cosmic rays?" John said.

"Nothing like that came up on the monitors and it would have affected more than the seven of us," J'onn replied shifting back into kid form, "I can't maintain my adult form indefinitely."

"HA! So you are affected!" Bruce snapped and pointed at J'onn. Everyone looked at him, "What? I….I had a lot of aggression issues as a kid…."

"Oh, don't worry," Wally said, "We noticed."

"Anyway cosmic rays are out. So magic?" Sharyera throughout, "I mean that's what happened to you guys last time right?"

"Yea." Diana response with, "It was magic that Morgana used on us. Is there any way we could contact her?"

"We could get Zatanna to-" Clark started but Bruce cut him off.

"We need to keep as many people out of the know as we can." He said, "If it goes out of the league that the major players are unable to get involved with anything, this is what our foes will be waiting for."

"So are you saying that we can't trust Zatanna?"

"I am saying that if we start dragging people into this, we need to make sure they can be trusted to keep their mouths shut. It is bad enough we are children. It would be worst if word got out that superman is a child and has no powers don't you think?"

"Luther for one would jump on that," Clark sighed, "So am I stuck up here in the tower until we're normal again?"

"I don't know," Bruce frowned, "I'm not saying we can't reach out to others just maybe our less social members, like Dr. Fate."

"You would rather have Dr. Fate than Zatanna? The man we have had a lot of issues with, opposed to someone you have a personal connection with. I thought she was your friend?" Diana responded, "Do you not trust your friends?"

"She is my ex-girlfriend as well but that is beside the point. And as for your second question it would be best if I didn't answer that. Trust me. Our issues with Dr. Fate are mainly commutation issues which make him perfect."

"We are getting Zatanna." Diana said, "We all know and trust her. Most of us don't trust Dr. Fate."

"I think Bruce is right. Dr. Fate isn't a bad guy Diana," Sharyera commented, "You are thinking more of the helmet side of Dr. Fate. Kent Nelson knows a lot about magic without the helmet."

"I still think we should go to Zatanna."

"Fine. But half the league will know about this by lunch." Bruce argued

"She isn't going to tell." John challenged.

"I just want to be an adult again….I have something to do Friday. Where I need to be an adult." Clark threw out, "So whoever is going to get me into my adult body is fine with me. If Bruce thinks Dr. Fate is a better chose, then Dr. Fate it is."

"Typical, men align with men." Diana said, crossing her arm, "Sharyea at least has a valid reason for her views."

"I'm not joining Bruce 'cause he is a man! None of us are men or women. We are kids." Clark snapped.

"But you want to be a man!" Diana yelled. She seemed to have Tinkerbelle syndrome were she only had the ability to feel one emotion at a time.

"But you can bet before we're through! Somehow I'll make a man out of you! You must be quick as a coursing river! With the strength of a great Typhoon! -" Wally started singing enthusiastically before Bruce threw a bat-erang at him.

"Where did you get that?" Wally said, jumping out of the way.

"I always have some on me…" Bruce looked back at the two fighting superheroes. They were yelling at each other. "Diana….Clark…..FOCUS!"

They both looked at him guiltily before turning to each other and muttering, "We're sorry."

"All in favor of going to Dr. Fate for help raise your hand," John said waving his madly in the air, "And say Aye."

"Aye," came from Bruce, Clark, Sharyea and Wally.

"Apposed," John asked, hand down.

"Nye," came from Diana and J'onn. J'onn didn't really care but he felt one of them should vote with Diana. So she won't lose it.

"The Aye's have it," John created a gavel with his ring and pounded it on the table happily.

"What about you?" Diana asked, turning on John.

"I….I….It doesn't matter how I vote, the vote would still be to the ayes."

**AN:**

Kita chan and I would love you hear from anyone reading this wonderful love child of ours. We also thank everyone that Favorited or Author Alerted this story. But really please review. Feed back is a girl's best friend! Fuck diamonds! WE CRAVE FEEDBACK!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

THE FREAKEDOUT FIVE

They couldn't do anything from the Watch Tower. Bruce had all his information on Dr. Fate stored on the Bat computer because he hadn't trusted Question to have potential access to the information. Because face it the Question is not above hacking into the Watch Tower's computers. Which everyone knew had most likely already happened. J'onn being the only one that could pretend to be their normal self stayed behind. He would keep the other league members from finding out there was a problem for as long as he could. So there they were in the manor, Bruce refusing to allow them down stairs into the cave even though it wasn't like they haven't been there before. Diana looked around, clicking her tongue. They were sitting in one of the many parlors, waiting for Alfred to come back with snacks.

"Who wants to bet Bruce is playing a video game instead?" Wally asked the group.

"I doubt he is doing that, he doesn't like this any more than the rest of us." Clark snapped.

"Okay gees you act like I said he was a poohead or something."

"Well." Diana interjected, "He is the one who's bothered the most by this. You know how he is about control." Wally nodded; it wasn't just the attack from earlier. Batman had been known to refuse any thing in the Watch Tower he didn't bring himself, and had dumped full pots of coffee to make a new one. All because he wanted to make sure if wasn't de-cafe. Alfred came in and left the snacks. He muttered something under his breath about dragging Master Bruce up.

"Okay point made. I'm bored though."

"Me too," John added and began playing with his power ring. He made a mini robot to attack the snacks only to have Sharyea hit him. The Robot stopped dead in the plate of cookies. "Look what you made me do!"

"WHAT I MADE YOU DO? REALLY?"

The yelling attracted Damian into the parlor because their voice was in the almost completely silent manor. Inside he found a bunch of kids he didn't recognize.

"Please tell me my father didn't higher you to be my friends or something equally pathetic." Damian said, looking them over. He couldn't decide what would be equally pathetic but he didn't want to find out.

"Oh my god, would he?" The red head asked, jumping around before anyone could stop him. He crossed the room very quickly and Damian realized something was wrong. "I mean, I would be your friend for free but I have bills to pay!"

"The Flash?" Damian recognized the red head speedster. He looked around the rest of the room, realize the rest of the founders were now around his age. "What happened to…" He stopped, and thought to himself, "Never mind, I realized I don't care."

"What if I told you your Dad has the same problem we do?" Wally asked and made a move like he was going to put an arm around the boy but thought better of it.

"I still wouldn't care that much, but if it is true, I need to call Dick. I sense a round of mocking coming on."

"Well call away we've been mocking him for his height," Wally laughed.

"And you got beaten up for that stupid," John reminded him.

"So my father is short now?"

"Oh very." Clark said. That was when Bruce entered the room.

"What Lies are you telling my son?" He asked, as Damian raised his hand to the top of his head, and measured himself against his father.

"It is true. I'm taller than you." Damian said, and the room went still. "Does this mean I don't have to listen to you anymore?"

"Not if you like living," Bruce growled, "And I'm still older then you."

Bruce watched Damian like a hawk to see if his son was going to be foolish enough to attack him. Damian got the picture, crossed the room to grab a cookie. He looked at the other heroes in the room, before decide to leave with a parting shot, "Whatever. I have better things to do."

"I love you too," Bruce said waving at Damian as he left. He turned to the rest of the group, "That Kid is going to be the death of me."

"That's not a surprise." Clark muttered under his breath, "Do we have what you needed?"

"Yes. It is time to see Dr. Fate."

"Quick question," The Flash asked, "Can I drive?"

"None of us are driving!" Clark interrupted, "We can't even reach the petals!"

"THEN HOW DID WE GET HERE!" Wally shouted.

"The teleportal." Bruce said, wondering how Wally had the ability to do an experiment to give him superpowers but not smart enough to remember things that had happened that day. "Now then, can we get on with it?"

THE SILLY SIX

Doctor Fate's Compound:

Dr. Fate was doing what his Thursday morning routine was. He was sitting in his big chair, coffee on the end table and the morning paper in his lap. He was still dressed in his robe, and large, bunny slippers. It was quiet as it always was. He took a sip from his coffee and turned the next page.

When something DRAMTIC happened and the child version of the Justice League was standing in his living room. "Well. This is different. I suppose this is the reason for your visit then." He said, folding up his paper.

"Yes we need your help." Clark begged.

"Well I'll see what I can do," Dr. Fate sighed putting down his newspaper, "How long have you been like this?"

"A few hours," Bruce answered frowning, "We're all the same age too."

"J'onn is also changed," Sharyera added.

"Anyone else?" Dr. Fate crossed his fingers and looked over the six of them. Diana shook her head no. "Well then, we will run some test. Anything odd before this happen? Any strange feelings or hungry for something that isn't exactly food?"

"You mean, have any of us developed Pica?" Batman asked. "Really?"

"Magic shows up in Odd ways, as I am sure you have learned."

"What's Pica?" John asked looking around the room debating trying to play with any of the cool shinny things.

"It is where you have a craving for things that are not food. Like Chalk." Diana answered and they all looked at her, "What? I read a lot. Banished from home, you remember?"

Bruce shook his head, "Whatever." Dr. Fate got up from his chair.

"Whatever you remember before you got in this form would be helpful."

"I was stopping a drug cartel. At least trying too." Bruce answered, "Clark was sleeping, And Wally was playing Darts."

"HEY! I was doing super-hero-ing like you!"

"Playing with Trickster isn't the same as taking down a cartel!"

"It keeps him off the streets!" Wally paused before adding, "And sane! I can keep my villains off the streets and sane by playing darts? Then I'm gonna keep playing darts with them! LETS SEE YOU DO THAT? OH WAIT, YOU JUST FUCK THEM!"

The room went really quiet. Everyone looked at Bruce, as if to wait and see his reaction. He took a deep breathe, before launching at Wally, "I WAS DRUGGED!"

Dr. Fate watched the two boys roll around his floor, fighting, but doing nothing to stop it. "I take it this has happened before?" he asked Sherya as Diana and John went to pull them apart.

"Yes."

"You were drugged by Talia but what about Catwoman, or that other chick!"

"Wally shut up!" John yelled pulling a rabid Bruce off the red head using his ring.

"If I'm getting a beating then I sure as hell better deserve it!" Wally cried out. The two were pulled apart and sent to different corners of the room on time out.

After a few test later, Dr. Fate was left scratching his head. "There seems to be no cause, but you did seem to have some left over effects of Lazaurs-" Dr. Fate didn't get a chance to finish the word when Bruce jumped to his feet, "THAT BITCH!"

"You're still on timeout," Dr. Fate started to say more as Bruce left his corner.

"I'm gonna KILL HER!" Bruce yelled stomping to the door.

"It doesn't have-," Dr. Fate kept trying to say but the other super children where racing to follow the raging batchild. "Fine. Ask for my help and then leave. Freaking Kids."

THE SILLY SIX

Lex Corp.

The Superchildren found themselves at the reception desk of Lex Corp so fast they weren't sure if Bruce didn't have super powers. "Excuse me," Bruce was leaning over the desk to speak to the large woman behind it, "I need to speak with my mom, Talia Head?"

"Oh I'm sorry sweetheart, but she is not seeing anyone today. She is very busy." The woman pushed the glasses up on the bridge of her nose.

"Are you sure?" Bruce started to choke up, as if he was going to cry, "Because poor Fluffy got" His voice began to break and the water works began to flow, "got-ot Hit and I wa-nt to talk to my mo-m"

"Okay, Okay Sweetie, stop crying, I will get you and your friends upstairs," She said, coming behind the desk to pull Bruce into a bear hug, "It will be okay."

"I-I Lo-v-ed," Bruce snuffled and rubbed his face a bit in her cleavage because hey if she's gonna shove his face into them might as well enjoy it, "Fluffy!"

"Awe, there, there Sweetie." The woman let Bruce go and leaded them up to Talia's office, "Mrs. Head, your son is here." She said, opening the door and letting them pile in.

"Oh, Well that is a pleasant surprise." Talia said, getting up from her desk, "You can leave us Nancy."

The second Nancy was out of ear shot Bruce turned on her, "WHY DID YOU DO IT!"

"Huh, you're not Damian," Talia turned and looked at the other children, "He doesn't have this many minions. Who are you?"

**AN: As always Kita chan and I love and live for reviews. LIVE! So tune in next time to find out **_**What**_** Talia did, **_**IF**_** it had anything to do with our plot and **_**Why**_** she did it.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

**MORE OF THE SILLY SIX**

Bruce stared at Talia. "Really, you really can't tell who I am?" She looked at him harder, and then it clicked.

"Beloved?" She asked, sounding confused, "Oh no, this won't do. Make yourself taller." She waved her hand as if he could do it at will. "We can't rule the world like this."

Bruce was not amused. "You think I would do that if I could. And what does it matter, you did this to us!" Talia looked over the rest of the children in the room. "And I told you, I don't want to be part of your plans. Now fix this."

"Beloved, I would fix this if I actually had anything to do with it. I mean really why would I want you to be a child? This does nothing for me," Talia waved her hand to indicated his whole physic, "I know you like to blame me for things but I need you as an adult if we are going to rule the world."

"Why would it matter if I was an adult or not-" Bruce stopped when she realized what she was talking about, and face palmed. "Never mind. NO. Just No. NEVER AGAIN." It was like he had forgotten the rest of the league in the room with him. "Then why the hell do I have Lazarus serum in me." He gestured to the rest of the founders, "Why do we have it in us? What are you planning?"

"Is this how he normally works?" Wally leaned in next to John to whisper in his ear. Bruce still heard him.

"NO! I'm just small and pissed off about it. It's clouding my judgment!" Bruce shouted at him defensively. He turned back on Talia, "So what is? Making us to be too small to be a threat? What the hell is your big master plan? Getting us all put on time out while you take out the rest of the league? Or how about we can't fight you at night cause of curfews?"

"You'd break that anyway," Wally stage whispered.

"Shut up! I'm WORKING HERE!" Bruce yelled waving his arms around then turned back to Talia. She was smiling at him, "And you! You are creeping me out! STOP LOOKING AT ME LIKE THAT! What was the point of dosing us with Lazarus? You had to have had a plan? You or your father?"

"Awe beloved you are adorable in this form. Our son wasn't this cute as a child," She moved like she was going to pinch his cheeks or something. Bruce dodged and gave her his best glare. She giggled.

"Talia," He would later refuse to call it whining, "Just give me an answer about the Lazarus!"

"Oh I don't remember it was a stupid plan." She went back behind her desk, "I mean, my father and I lost interest. Lex may have been involved. Honestly it just wasn't a plan that had any value, though Lex may not have been involved, he would have gone through with it. The man is dedicated; that's for sure," She stopped looking at over the others as well as Bruce. "You all are just so adorable right now, I think I have some chocolate in my desk, do you kids want some?" She began to dig through her drawers like this was something that happened every day.

"Should….we take it?" Clark asked Diana, not sure what to think about the whole scene.

She just shrugged. "What is the worst that could happen? It makes us younger?"

"Don't take thing she gives you, it could drugged or have more Lazarus serum in it!" Bruce shouted clearly standing his position on the subject.

"Beloved, keep your voice down, we are inside," She was using her mother voice, as she pulled a bag of fun size snicker bars out of her desk, "Plus putting Lazarus serum in these would make them taste awful. And I love chocolate, you know that."

"If you love it so much than why don't you marry it!" Bruce shouted than blinked a few times.

"Did you really just say that?" Clark asked his eyes also wide.

Bruce chose to ignore his own outburst and move on to another subject. "You've drugged and raped me before! Why would I trust anything you give me? Because I remembering the last time!" Bruce shouted to get back on track.

"Well you're a child right now, Beloved; I would hope you'd think a little better of me than that. Plus, I wouldn't do that in front of an audience, I'm a lady after all. Also I do already have your DNA on file should I need another child from you." Talia unwrapped a snickers and popped it into her mouth. Bruce just gave her a blank look for a moment, "Plus there are the clones. It is more fun the other way of course."

"Is she talking about what I think she's talking about?" John asked, mostly to Diana.

Diana gives him a blank stare and shrugged.

"You know? Like horses," John made a green horse to emphasize his point. Complete with a partner. Diana blinked but still kept up with the blank face, Clark just faced palmed and became a little sad that this wasn't going to be fixed in time for his date.

Sherya tried not to burst out laughing, "Look at Bruce! Diana, I think he's gonna blow a gasket soon!" Diana began to crack a little bit of a smile.

Sherya was right. Bruce just looked at his hands and they shook, as if he was trying to get a handle on it. He grabbed at his face and released a loud groan. "I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANY MORE!" He then dropped himself on the floor and began to pound his fist on it, throwing a temper tantrum like a ten year. Which made sense because he was one at the time; the rest of the group decided to watch and risk eating some of the chocolate that Talia was offering. They were getting a snack and a show after all. Talia shook her head and after a few moments, she got up and pulled the small child into her arms.

"It's okay, beloved, let it out." She rubbed his back very motherly. It was unnerving for the rest of the group.

"I really don't know what to think right now." Diana said, looking over at Sherya. "Should….we stop this?"

"Normally I would say yes," Sherya paused and looked at the crying batchild, "But honestly how often do you think he got hugged by a woman as a child? I think he needs this. Maybe he will be a little more normal when all this is said and done."

There was a paused, and then a "Nahhhh" Out of the rest of the group.

"We should leave it be," Clark added with a mouthful of chocolate.

"This is scarier than him attacking me," Wally was actually hiding behind John as he said this.

Bruce was too busy screaming and crying to listen to the peanut gallery, "You're being too ni-i-ce! I don't like you! I'm never going to love-ve you again! I don't wan-na be a kid anymore! You're not my Mother!"

"I know Beloved, I know. Now let's take some deep breaths, and have some chocolate…" She had calmed him down a little, were Bruce was only sniffing, as she handed him a few bars of chocolate.

"I don't wanna eat chocolate….I want to be an-an adult again." He said, as he unwrapped them to pop in his mouth.

"I know."

"Who knew that the way to break the batman by making him ten." John said to Wally.

"I heard that!" Bruce mumbled through tears and chocolate, "And when I'm big again I'm punching you!"

"You punched me earlier!" Wally shouted.

"Can we not fight each other?" Clark begged, "Please! It's counterproductive!"

"Why don't you attack John, huh? Why you gotta pick on me?"

"Because John can make a force field and you are too dumb to run away!"

The two were about to go at it again when Talia stepped in. "STOP IT!" She pulled out her scary mother voice, which caused Wally and Bruce to stop and look at the floor. "Now then. I'm willing to help you beloved, but you will have to do something for me." She put her arms around Bruce.

"I'm not doing anything that would end in me being raped again," Bruce began to detangle himself from Talia.

"Dinner when you're back to normal."

"That would end in rape, so no."

"Visiting rights to Damian."

"No. That kid's suffered enough."

"Oh alright I just get to do this then!" she got Bruce in a head lock and pinched one of his cheeks, "You're so cute!"

"Let go!" He pushed her off.

"Well, I will see what I can find out for you. I'll be touch. Now get out of my office."

"Come on Bruce we should leave now," Diana held out her hand to him. Talia twitched a little and her left eye started to tick as Bruce took it.

"We'll be in touch." Bruce said, as they all left. Talia waited till the door was shut before pulling out a radio from her desk.

"Yes…Beloved, we will be."

**AN: Kita chan and I love you people! So that being said we did have a reason for calling Talia a bitch in our last chapter and we're going to argue that point later because our original plan for this chapter was derailed by humor. Talia just would not be bitchy yet! No matter how hard we tried. But the crazy will be out the next time.**


	5. Chapter 5

**SERIOUS SIX**

They all headed to the elevator that Nancy had lead them to before. Bruce pressed the down button before turning around to lean up against the wall in though. "So, I've got a question," Wally asked, holding the bag of candy that was once in Talia's desk. No one asked why he had taken it, but since Talia wasn't chasing them down for it, it was no big lost to her it appeared.

"What?" Bruce asked, having a feeling that he was going to have to punch the speedster again.

"Why is she a bitch? She seemed really nice and gave us candy!" He shook the bag to prove his point. Bruce stared at him a little as if unsure of what to say, remembering what he had said at Dr. Fate's.

"Is the she's a bitch for raping you?" Sherya added to the impromptu interrogation. "Because that's a good enough reason for me."

Bruce rubbed his forehead, "No…I mean, that is an interesting part of the glorious crap that woman has pulled on me, but for the most part, she is a bitch for all the crap she has put Damian through."

"She's his mother, she couldn't-" Clark started to say but Bruce cut him off.

"She raised him to kill and bark orders so she could use him to rule the world, and when he met Dick and I and started to agree with us, she decide to grow a new son, a clone, because, you know, she could start over and have a perfect son. And don't get me started on the hit. She is a bitch." He shrugged, "I hate to say it, but it is a fact. Plain and simple."

"She put a hit on her son?" Diana wanted to clarify.

"Yes."

Diana stared at him for a moment or two, "You're right she is a bitch," Diana agreed only to have the others stare at her. "What? She paid people to kill her son, for what reason?" She looked at Bruce, who shrugged, "She didn't have a reason did she?"

"To upset me?"

"She's a bitch." Diana crossed her arms, as if it made it final. The others could only nod at that.

The elevator door opened and the group walked out into the lobby. This shouldn't have been a problem; in fact it should have been very easy thing for them but sadly they had forgotten where they were. Lex Luthor was standing in the lobby, which considering he owned the building this shouldn't have been as surprising as it was. "Balls." Bruce muttered and Clark made an audible 'meep'.

Lex turned at the noise like a cat that hears a bird chirp in its back yard. He stalked over and smiled, "Children," He looked at Nancy, behind her desk, "Nancy, look at all the little children in the lobby, especially the little girl who looks just ready for Halloween, with those hawk wings. Why are there Children in the Lobby Nancy?"

"Oh one of the boys is Mrs. Head son." She said, but thankful she was having a hard time telling the different between Bruce and Clark.

"Mrs. Head's son huh?" Lex looked closely at the two, "Well you kids should come up to my office, see where working hard in life can get you."

Diana tried to break free from the group, "Really, sir, we must be going," She grabbed Bruce and Clark by the arms, but Lex stopped her.

"Now, now, my sweet girl, it is no trouble." He led them back into the elevator. Diana shot a look at Bruce like she was trying to ask what do. They were in a pickle, and they knew it. They couldn't make a scene here, because of Nancy, and that might blow their cover. And they need to keep their cover at the very least.

The elevator closed and there they where six superheroes turned into kids with Lex Luthor, one supervillain that would have no qualms killing one of them. He hated Superman that much. What was a few children murdered to him. The look Lex was giving at Clark and Bruce proved that. "So, children, let's play a game, which one of you is Superman…or should I say, Superboy?"

Clark was never happier in his life that he and Bruce looked like they could be twins, and that they both were wearing Batman shirts. Lex looked over the other kids in the elevator, "The girls are out, so is the African American child, the red head….that leaves the two of you." He looked hard at Bruce and Clark.

"Balls." Bruce muttered again, trying not to look at Clark, as if that would give it away. Why did they let Clark down here, why didn't they leave him with J'onn where he would have been safe.

"Really mister you got it all wrong, we were visiting Miss. Head," Diana spoke up trying to draw Lex's attention off the two.

"Nice try princess but your little friend with the wings gives you away," Lex smirked. "You all are really not that smart, are you?" Diana saw Bruce's nose twitch, but he didn't say anything.

"We've beaten you how many times? I think we're pretty smart." Wally voiced.

"Listen you little brat!" Lex exploded and made to grab him, "I'm willing to let you lot live but make no mistake I'll kill you just as easily." Wally stayed out of his reach, which was hard because of how closed in they were inside the elevator. "The Flash. Well, at least we know who you are." He regained control, and tugged on his suit as the door opened, "Come along children." There was a pause because people were in the hallway and they couldn't just make a run for it.

He herded them like sheep into his office, telling his secretary to hold all his calls. Wally was shaking, and the only thing that kept him from darting under Luthor's desk was Diana's hold on his hand. Sherya shot Diana a look and the two nodded. "It will be alright, Flash," She muttered to him, as she patted his arm. "I have this under control."

"Whose bright idea was it to come to Lex-corp?" Clark whispered at Bruce.

"Shut up, I'm ten."

"Now Boys, it isn't good to keep secrets." Lex said, looking at the two of them.

"Say's the man pretending to be an honest business man," Diana answered for them, "We are people of action; lies do not become us."

"Big Words for a small girl, though I suppose it would be unfair to call you that."

"Yes. It would." Diana crossed her arms.

"Princess."

"My identity was never hidden from anyone, Luther." She said his name like one would refer to a bowel movement.

"No I suppose not," Lex looked bored, "But Superboy and Batboy, how nice to know you look so similar. If you would be so kind as to tell me which is which."

"I'm Batman," Clark and Bruce said in unison. Neither seemed willing to give up this idea, but Luther wasn't detoured on this fact.

"Come now, you can't both be Batman. Be a little truthful boys, or more than one of you is going to end up dead."

Diana stepped in front of them, "You would have to go through me, Luther."

"And what are you going to do about it Princess?"

"I do have a punch that can shatter robots. Do you want to test what it can do to a human?" Diana popped her knuckles. "Because I have been a little curious."

"You really expect me to believe you're going to shatter my bones or something along those lines?"

"I'm a child, as you keep pointing out, perhaps I don't know my own strength." Diana said, "But you have to ask yourself, do you feel lucky, Luther? Well, do you?" Clark would have face palmed if he didn't have to hope that Diana would protect them. Clearly she had been watching too many movies with Wally.

John had wandered over to the shark tank in Lex's office as Diana distracted Lex. No one picked on his friends and was going to get away with it. Sherya was thinking the same thing and made her way around the room looking for a weapon. That was when she spied a large vase. It was white and blue, and looked expensive. She began to move slowly toward it.

Lex was bemused by Diana's actions, he didn't think she would hit him, but he didn't want to take the chance. Superboy was close, and he could taste it. That was when he remembered the kryptonite in his desk. "What do you know? I believe it's my lucky day." He said, as he went to pull it out of his desk drawer.

Bruce realized what he was going for, "I'm Superboy," He said quickly, as Clark's mouth fell open.

"Really?" Lex paused. In his hand was the key to his desk. He smiled darkly and continued to walk to his desk, "Than I have just the thing for you."

Wally spotting the key ran as fast as he could to hit Luthor's hand with enough force to make him drop the key before doubling back to pick it up. The Villain was less than amused, "You little brat!" He snapped, before trying to go after the speeder. He gave up as Wally did a few laps around the room and turned onto Bruce.

"Balls," The fake Superboy said, cursing himself to try and protect Clark, which he had now decided was all Clarks fault they were there. He darted out of Lex's reach, but he was no way as fast as Wally.

Diana had had enough. She grabbed a chair and threw it at Lex. This was apparently a sign John was waiting for as he used the power ring to break into the tank and throw the shark yelling "Shark Attack!" as he did so. Sherya held her vase at the ready and got into position near Lex.

"Balls." Lex said as all three things were flying toward him. Realizing that there was no way for him not to get hit, he decided the best thing to do was take his lumps and dodge the shark. The chair and vase both hurt, but it was the super speed kick to the balls that did him in. He muttered something under his breath, before passing out.

"We are Leaving, NOW!" Diana said, punching out one of the windows in the office.

"But people saw us-" Bruce started.

"Bruce, you are either coming with us or staying here, I don't care which." Bruce walked over wordless and took her hand. "Come on, John, wanna make a plane for the rest?"

"You know I do!" He gave her a shit-eating grin, grabbed Wally and made a plane that looked more like a space ship.

"Hey you know it's not the shark's fault he's owned by a megalomaniac," Clark voiced pointing at the shark, "Put it back in the tank."

"Oh okay mom."

"I'm not the mom I'm just—"

"I said NOW!" Diana shouted, "And John put the poor shark back!" The poor shark in question was lying in the middle of the office, gasping for air and looking pitifully at anyone who would give it any attention.

"Alright," John said. He put it back and noticed the look he was getting from the others, "I'm sorry. I didn't think about how it would hurt the shark."

"Just be glad Aquaman wasn't here," Wally said as they left.

**AN: Kita chan and I thank you for all reviews, and favorites and anything else you might want someone to thank you for. So thank you! We probably didn't answer any questions that might have been left in the last chapter but we have short attention spans. Also no sharks where permanently hurt in the making of this chapter. **

**OAN: I am Kitachan and I approve this message**


	6. Question time with The Question

**Question time with The Question**

You are confused. This isn't a chapter you say to yourself, it's almost like the authors of this story you are following, have written an author note but it's trying to be a story. In fact that's not even the strangest part of the situation you have found yourself in. There is a man. Over-coat. Blue fedora. Orange socks. He has no face. You try to look away but find you can't.

He speaks, "Hello, I'm the Question you may remember me from such trades as the one where I died. Of Cancer because writers are weird. Some may have mistaken me for my female replacement, but find I'm lacking breast and a sad few are wondering why my mask is different. That's Rorschach you're thinking of. Anyways, you have questions, and I'm here to answer you." There is a table and chairs next to the two of you, and the Question has you sit down.

"There was been some questions about Canon. And here is the rule that Kita and Lightdragon have decided upon. It is pretty simple. Whatever is mentioned happened."

You feel puzzled but before you can voice this Question continues, "They are going off of both the comics and the TV show though admittedly more the show than the former. This has created their own head canon. Any continuity you thought you knew could be thrown out a window at any moment. It is part of the conspiracy. While they are not as heavy involved as the girl scouts are, they are on the lower scale. Just like you." He turns his head just a little bit, and you feel unnerved, "You with your little fandom."

You start to move away, and notice a door that wasn't there before. You decide to make a run for it. As you run away, you hear him shout, "YES! THE FLASH DID KICK HIM IN THE BALLS!"

_**A/N from Kita chan:**_ Since Fan fiction won't let us just answer your questions, we decide to write something that I believe to be the creepiest thing I have ever written in my life. The goal was to make it funny….And ended up with freaking creepy. Anyways, the other thing I wanted to say was, there is a woman with wings that she can't take off I also bet she's been on TV. Lex is the smartest man in the world supposedly; I'm going to assume he just put two and two together. And I wanted The Question to say tits, but LIGHTDRAGON WON'T LET ME! I'm also going to point out we did have Wally dart quickly around when Lex reached for him, which revealed him as the flash. Bruce is a common name, I know three and Lex probably thinks a Bruce is Superman.

_**A/N from Lightdragon:**_ I really hope this answers some questions. That's the main goal of this quasi chapter we will continue our regularly scheduled fanfiction now. Sorry to all who were hoping for a really chapter.


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